It’s been a bit quiet on the Western Front for me lately but alas, I’m back with some very quick snippet reviews of some movies I’ve caught over the past few weeks.

There have been definite hits and misses but as always, these are my opinions and take them with a grain of salt. You may feel completely different…in which case, best of luck!

The Conjuring

The conjuring
Shame about this film was that, as is so often the case at the moment, the trailer and hype was better than the actual film itself. After reading and hearing an unreal amount of reviews touting it as ‘the scariest film of the year’ and something that was going to unnerve you and disrupt your sleep for days, I had my hopes up.

Nothing really clicked for me. There were some ‘jumpy’ moments but all in all, it wasn’t anything I hadn’t seen done before in a hundred different ghost/demonic possession films. How many more of the Warren investigation stories are going to be adapted into formulaic horror films?

Annabelle the doll was a particular highlight for me, as was the performance of Vera Farmiga as Lorraine Warren. Also, I may make some enemies here, but the whole wardrobe ‘scare’…saw it coming a mile off. Bad execution. Sorry folks but I’ve seen enough horror films to be caught out by that old chestnut.

Rating: 5/10

Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa

Steve Coogan’s beloved comedy character finally stampedes onto the big screen and the transition not only works, it’s ‘ruddy brilliant’. The feature film takes everything we love about the Alan Partridge persona, cranks up the volume and then throws enough one-liners out to stick in the brain for days after.

It’s nice that somehow, even though you’re aware you’re watching a film, the makers of this instant classic allow an ‘extended TV episode’ feel to permeate through the story.

It’s gags-a-plenty and some familiar faces are prone to appear, with the vintage Partridgism’s all out in full force for this, which surprised many as one of the stand-out comedy films of 2013. Well worth the watch to see how Alan tackles his biggest gig yet: a hostage situation at North Norfolk Digital radio, led by a disgruntled and recently sacked DJ.

Rating: 8/10

The Lone Ranger


Johnny Depp (as expected) steals every scene he’s in during this Disney-Verbinski-Bruckheimer blockbuster, all due respect to the actual Lone Ranger himself, Armie Hammer (who commands a very respectable screentime in his own right). That’s all that really needs to be said.

It’s done very much in that tried and tested Pirates of the Caribbean style and why tamper with something that works. HUGE action pieces, brilliant tongue-in-cheek comedy and an all-star cast deliver a great big, epic feeling film. Suddenly, it’s become cool to like Wild West films again I think.

BIG twist too. Go watch it, it’s a long film but if truth be told, it’s one of those rare films you can say you’ll have ‘fun’ watching.

Rating 8/10

You’re Next

On paper, this could have been fantastic. Great concept (if not unlike The Strangers) but let down by truly awful performances and unnecessary, pointless humour. I get there was supposed to be a dark, comedic edge to the film in certain places, but it was just so poorly pulled off it didn’t help the movie, simply hamper it.

There were some inventive deaths, a great reveal shortly towards the end and the fact that innocent looking lead Erin (played by Sharni Vinson) turns out to be like the love child of Home Alone’s Kevin McCallister and Rambo did turn my head, but there were just too many missed opportunities for me.

I’ll close by saying you’ll never see the same side to using a blender!

Rating: 6/10

So I’m not sure if you’ve seen any of the above films or agree/disagree with my viewpoints but get involved and let me know either by commenting or following me on Twitter, hounding me with your own feedback.